You do not have to be someone’s teacher. Focus on your lessons.
The difference between sincerity and self righteousness is that with the former, the other person may walk away feeling validated. Validation means victory. Your part is ending it with that note. Victimhood means more rehashed than resolved. Again, you do not have to be their teacher.
Staying in the Essence of You means to be transparent and trustworthy in that. You must validate your own intuition but don’t let it distract you. Sometimes it is good to listen and engage less. Less is more.
It may seem difficult to try to get your viewpoint in with others. But let me say this. Multitasking is an illusion. You multitask all the time. The pace and performance are interchangeable. Anxiety is self induced. Remain calm and focus on one thing at a time. This is call present time consciousness. Focus on the Now. What point is being made now? Rehashing will not be received. Validate the Now. If you’re still holding onto something from the past, let it go. Remain proactive. Solution oriented. In the Now.
Let go the past. Do not rehash. Remain proactive. Receive only the Now.
Self sufficiency and self worth should be internal and not external. When it is external it is temporary. When you need others to validate the internal then it is time to let the universe teach them their lessons.
Focus only on your lessons. Stay a student. Even if others are incorrect you must release the need to hold them accountable and find out how you can improve. Assertion, while a positive goal, can override empathy. In survival and self protection, we can learn to use empathy as a tool to communicate with another as in those moments it can be easily discarded and dissuaded from our own ego based version of reality.
Fill your bucket and have a proactive plan for when there are misunderstandings ahead of time. Strategize. What will you do if in a professional arena you are harassed? Treated a certain way? How will you take responsibility to create positivity? And reinforce an environment of productivity?
Filling your bucket begins in stages. When your bucket is full, not many can tip it. That starts with stability (income etc), task management (bills), organization, life skill learning, goals and hobbies. You have a unique gift to offer the world. When you are accountable for filling your bucket, you can overcome the odds and plan to be proactive. The internal validation comes from self worth in succeeding with your goals. But ultimate success is not simply goal reaching. It is structure, security, self worth, surrender and staying two steps ahead of where you are by planning to be proactive in the event of crisis to be very calm and focused on Now, on you and on solutions. It is better to resolve by using things to create a better system, piece of work or outcome in other words create meaning. That is how it can “finish.” Walk in with excuses, leave with an emptier bucket. Stay silent and observe to find better solutions. The universe will take care of the lessons. It will come out. Stay focused on personal goals. If someone can tip your bucket then it’s not full enough. Walk in expecting victory, never as a victim. Resolving is simple. Rehash and relive. Let go and let grow.
Empathy and Ego deserve two different roles. Empathy in letting go. Ego in letting yourself grow and stay accountable. When reversed, you’re walking with shoe laced tied to both feet. You will trip. Start with the others perspective, end with your growth. You can read a situation without saying it. Relax, calm down and slow down. Breathe in the Now. Don’t make mountains out of molehills because the problems will double as well as the self doubt. Find gratitude as someone out there would easily trade you problems. There are kids struggling against chemo, people who have lost lives and limbs to war, heroes who self sacrifice in instances where they have more to lose… You look at them and go, you know what? I’m fine. I’m good. It is all perspective. Reality shifts by the observers mentality. If the opposite occurs and someone has it better than you. They have more wealth, health, whatnot. The same principal applies in learning others would trade for your problems or the Joneses are sweeping the street with all they win. You have you. You are responsible for only that. The attitude you bring in is an outfit of choice. You may not have been born with it but ultimately it is still something you wear like jewels that must be polished. As to what will define you? The lesson is as simple as it is difficult.
None of it matters.